Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Labels
I just went through the entire blog and put labels in each post. The categories are "CGDA" "Comments" "F1R5T P05T" "Fake nobility" "Insanity" "Jonathan Coulton" "Laziness" "Math" "Observations" "PORTaL" "Pre-Essay Posts" "School" "Sick" "The Future" "Thing that wasn't on Thursday" "Thinking my audience doesn't know things" "Thursday Thing" "Updats" and "Youtube".
CGDA Stands for "Canned Goods Don't Age". It is the Webcomicish stuff I've done so far. CGDA is also the standard tuning of a cello.
Thursday Thing is the stuff that I do on Thursday.
Observations are little things that I've observed.
Thing that wasn't on Thursday is just that: A thing that wasn't on Thursday.
Ah... Organization. How nice.
P.S. I know "updates" is spelled wrong. And there are two types of spellings of observations. They are the same thing. "obserations", and "Observations". Why? Because I felt like it. Well, actually because I spelled it wrong the first time and was too lazy to fix it. Go ahead, kill the messenger... Who happened to have also been the culprit.
CGDA Stands for "Canned Goods Don't Age". It is the Webcomicish stuff I've done so far. CGDA is also the standard tuning of a cello.
Thursday Thing is the stuff that I do on Thursday.
Observations are little things that I've observed.
Thing that wasn't on Thursday is just that: A thing that wasn't on Thursday.
Ah... Organization. How nice.
P.S. I know "updates" is spelled wrong. And there are two types of spellings of observations. They are the same thing. "obserations", and "Observations". Why? Because I felt like it. Well, actually because I spelled it wrong the first time and was too lazy to fix it. Go ahead, kill the messenger... Who happened to have also been the culprit.
Observation!
I saw a YouTube video the other day with two uploader comments, two top rated comments... and one "other" comments. yOUtUBE IS SO ELITIST!!!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
PORTaL
AFTeR getting my free copy of portal, I immediately realized what an amazing game it was. The graphics, physics, and plot are stunning. But there is more. For I have learned that the mighty overlord JONATHAN COULTON himself wrote music for it. Get the game and finish it; he wrote the ending theme. (NOtE: I already knew this... I just still think that it's awesome.)
In other news: I like to factor quadratics. YEAH.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
YouTube
How to get into the Highest rated comments list on YouTube
These days, with the prices of colleges rocketing, the easiest way of getting into Yale or Harvard is not to pay all of that money, but to win an award before the age of 16, preferably for an incredible piece of writing or some sort of scientific discovery.
Before now, those were the only things you could do. Before now, there was no other way to cheat your way into college. Before now, there was no other completely trustworthy blog to rely on for this kind of information.
But now that there is, we at You Are Here (YAH) have discovered a new type of award. Well, us and the rest of the Internet. Meet the new YouTube! The new YouTube has so many useless features, the old amount that it had will seem pitiful in comparison. Among the jumble of shiny buttons and irritating advertisements, they have added the "Highest rated comments" feature, the newest way to convince yourself that anyone on the Internet actually cares what you think.
At the scene of the funny (Or as Wikipedia puts it "Amateur") videos, we investigate the new feature, which allows you to see the comments with the most little green thumbs next to it at the top of the page. This is useful because before this I didn't know who to respect and who not to respect based on the opinions of anyone who has the ability to watch videos.
There are some clear patterns as to getting into the top rated comments, which are rated here in order of effectiveness:
1. Put a smiley face in your comment. (See the picture.)
2. Put in a quote from the video in your comment. "We are The Knights Who Say... NIE."
3. Say you love, dig, or are attracted to the vid. (Even though the vid will say that it "just wants to be friends.")
4. Be in the top rated comments list already; people trust other's judgement as long as they're on the same video.
5. Say that your ex-girl/boyfriend/favorite teacher who's class you aren't in anymore loves this song and it's so happy and so sad at the same time. (If you haven't seen examples of this, then I won't believe you when you say that you've been on YouTube before.)
So if you need to get into a college (Which I believe may come in handy at some point), simply take my advice and you will be in! Just make sure that you're on the right videos...
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Thursday, April 29, 2010
The Rapture of Chickens
Recently, Republican candidate for Nevada senator Sue Lowden stated that in order to "bring down the prices in hurry" on health care, we should all do what our grandparents did and "bring a chicken to the doctor" for payment. Obviously, this is absurd. Who eats chicken? The real solution is much simpler: bring hot pockets to the doctor. Although, I think doctors would like to dissect both equally; they both have the strangest and most unique chemicals and toxins inside of them.
Lowden has stuck to her statement since, saying that she "will not back down." And why should she? Her plan will save us all! Plus the wallet industry will have a huge boom in sales as they release chicken sized wallets. new credit cards will be released that store chickens. bank machines will have chicken shaped slots and a stick up will consist of the robber pointing a chicken chucker at the bank teller.
In fact, why can't we just go a step further and represent chickens in objects that are not chickens? It may sound preposterous, but what if the people who bred the chickens kept them in their houses and we'd go and exchange representations of chickens for real chickens? Disks, perhaps. Little metal disks... Or maybe slips of paper!
But what to call them? Well, I assume that the disks would be worth less, so with each other they'd add up to more. In Latin, the prefix "con" means "with". So why not call them... coins?
And the paper stuff would be worth twice as much as the "coins" and "Bi" means "double". So how about... Bills?
Clearly, this is what the future senator has in mind, but critics seem to think that she doesn't even have a mind, or a sane one, anyway. There have been many jokes and critiques, including this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZezfjWox5s and this blog: http://howdoyouspellcomicker.blogspot.com/ . This strikes me as odd. Don't these people know that Sue Lowden is going to save them all? In fact, she might just leave the chicken-less with their chicken-less banks while the rest of us ascend--gasp! Of course! This is the rapture! The rapture... of... chickens. Of course! Lowden is not a moron! She is a genius! Clearly she understands the irony of leaving the chicken-less below in the world, trapped in our coop and only fed when the master wants it to be so. Clearly she knows that if she instates the barter system, then she will have an excuse for destroying those people who always disagreed with her; the filthy, chicken-less idiots; the lousy morons who think before they say things. She's always found them so un-American.
Either that, or she just has some chickens, no money, and a bad case of Nostalgiaitis that she wants looked at.
Lowden has stuck to her statement since, saying that she "will not back down." And why should she? Her plan will save us all! Plus the wallet industry will have a huge boom in sales as they release chicken sized wallets. new credit cards will be released that store chickens. bank machines will have chicken shaped slots and a stick up will consist of the robber pointing a chicken chucker at the bank teller.
In fact, why can't we just go a step further and represent chickens in objects that are not chickens? It may sound preposterous, but what if the people who bred the chickens kept them in their houses and we'd go and exchange representations of chickens for real chickens? Disks, perhaps. Little metal disks... Or maybe slips of paper!
But what to call them? Well, I assume that the disks would be worth less, so with each other they'd add up to more. In Latin, the prefix "con" means "with". So why not call them... coins?
And the paper stuff would be worth twice as much as the "coins" and "Bi" means "double". So how about... Bills?
Clearly, this is what the future senator has in mind, but critics seem to think that she doesn't even have a mind, or a sane one, anyway. There have been many jokes and critiques, including this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZezfjWox5s and this blog: http://howdoyouspellcomicker.blogspot.com/ . This strikes me as odd. Don't these people know that Sue Lowden is going to save them all? In fact, she might just leave the chicken-less with their chicken-less banks while the rest of us ascend--gasp! Of course! This is the rapture! The rapture... of... chickens. Of course! Lowden is not a moron! She is a genius! Clearly she understands the irony of leaving the chicken-less below in the world, trapped in our coop and only fed when the master wants it to be so. Clearly she knows that if she instates the barter system, then she will have an excuse for destroying those people who always disagreed with her; the filthy, chicken-less idiots; the lousy morons who think before they say things. She's always found them so un-American.
Either that, or she just has some chickens, no money, and a bad case of Nostalgiaitis that she wants looked at.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Robot
Constricted by the laws of binary
depicted as a killer, scary
my life is not life,
my pain is not pain,
I should give up, I have nothing to gain.
depicted as a killer, scary
my life is not life,
my pain is not pain,
I should give up, I have nothing to gain.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
A post
I'm a seventh grader, and recently, on Buzz, some of my Eighth grade friends started dissing on my kind, calling us "Immature".
I responded in my favorite way: Long, annoying pieces of writing!.
I myself am a Sevie, and I, unlike all of my Sevie friends, recognize it for what it is: a raging disease.
Seviism is caused by many things, and each year, in Sevie season, it has a different cause. For example, this year, it is caused by being born in the year 1996--1997. But LAST year, it was caused by being born in 1995-1996--how mysterious!
When I was diagnosed with Seviism, I was rushed to the Sevie hospital, "School" in the Sevie ambulance "School Bus" to be toughened up. My parents were so worried, because those unfortunate individuals with Seviism rarely fit in. It is our curse, and yet our gift. I mean, who wants to hang out with these people?
A) http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?3076349 (Used to link to an Eightie who was calling us immature's picture)
B) http://www.faceb.comoto.ppid=3004&id=1220710202 (Formerly a link to another Eightie who was calling us immature's picture.)
C) http://www.google.com/prfile#buzz (''...)
Seviism is surprisingly not contagious, though we have seen examples of Eighties who have started acting like Sevies after "hanging out" with them for too long, like this unfortunate person:
http://www.google.com/profiles/101658635891089#buzz (Used to link to the page of an eighth grader calling us immature. She chills with Sevies.)
The opposite has also happened before:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?280241276342 (This link used to be a friend of mine who is tall and talks like an eighth grader. Smart kid.)
Some people are standing up to the racism against Seviism, such as this young idiot:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#buzz/10 (Used to link to my page.)
And this wise man:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#buzz/1008027 (A cool "Sevie" who doesn't like the term.)
A couple people take the whole "Sevie" thing too far, such as this guy:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#buzz/110150025795284681434 (Still a real link. click on it. UPDATE: The blogger link thing doesn't work. Copy and paste.)
I conclude.
I responded in my favorite way: Long, annoying pieces of writing!.
I myself am a Sevie, and I, unlike all of my Sevie friends, recognize it for what it is: a raging disease.
Seviism is caused by many things, and each year, in Sevie season, it has a different cause. For example, this year, it is caused by being born in the year 1996--1997. But LAST year, it was caused by being born in 1995-1996--how mysterious!
When I was diagnosed with Seviism, I was rushed to the Sevie hospital, "School" in the Sevie ambulance "School Bus" to be toughened up. My parents were so worried, because those unfortunate individuals with Seviism rarely fit in. It is our curse, and yet our gift. I mean, who wants to hang out with these people?
A) http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?3076349 (Used to link to an Eightie who was calling us immature's picture)
B) http://www.faceb.comoto.ppid=3004&id=1220710202 (Formerly a link to another Eightie who was calling us immature's picture.)
C) http://www.google.com/prfile#buzz (''...)
Seviism is surprisingly not contagious, though we have seen examples of Eighties who have started acting like Sevies after "hanging out" with them for too long, like this unfortunate person:
http://www.google.com/profiles/101658635891089#buzz (Used to link to the page of an eighth grader calling us immature. She chills with Sevies.)
The opposite has also happened before:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?280241276342 (This link used to be a friend of mine who is tall and talks like an eighth grader. Smart kid.)
Some people are standing up to the racism against Seviism, such as this young idiot:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#buzz/10 (Used to link to my page.)
And this wise man:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#buzz/1008027 (A cool "Sevie" who doesn't like the term.)
A couple people take the whole "Sevie" thing too far, such as this guy:
https://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#buzz/110150025795284681434 (Still a real link. click on it. UPDATE: The blogger link thing doesn't work. Copy and paste.)
I conclude.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Youtar
Hey, guys. Some of you may know that I've got... friends in high places. Well, I recently acquired some bits and pieces of the first in a trilogy of books by Christopher Paolini, Author of The Inheritance Chronicles. Here they are:
The Heirloom Chronicles: Youtar
by Christopher Paolini
The Fyre burned his face as he lit his Ligtin stone. He didn't care; his face was already so worn from the Nijtik battle that he could hardly tell pain from a hikopath bath in the jinkydink woods. Many men and Laktons alike had looked upon his face with fear, but he never seemed to mind. Perhaps he hadn't noticed it, or perhaps he climbed into their rooms at night and devoured them in their Rashtok beds. He used to joke about this with his Kilyitite wife; now she was gone, and so was his sense of humor.
Trying to forget those days, he fidlopred his Ligtin stone, but to no effect.
The wind seemed to whisper his name: Kroanshka Kroanshka Kroanshka! Like the pain, he ignored it.
"Binkar," he cursed as he closed his bright bluish-hefla eyes. "Binkar it all to Shnuffle."
A sudden lightningstrike got him out of his trance, and he pressed his two hands together to try the stone again to find that it was gone. He had thrown it.
An epic beginning to any book, but let's see how it evolves:
Kirshna pulled out her dagger and started to slowly carve out the intestines of the enemy Laktoon. It screamed, still alive even as its intestines were being chopped up.
Not for long, thought Kirshna. She started to smash its head and out poured a gooey liquid...
Awesome. I only wish I had more from that scene. Okay, this next part comes after we've learned most of the Laktoon language:
"Bleshtek! If vir ka mi so so so so lol bashta!" Kirshna lik hin vir, men so la vir. Lik no soma ti, lik no sore: Kirshna vosh bloue Ligtin Fidlopre.
"Lol voo vira lol Binkar Shnuffle!" Slikar lol so kindo Kroanshka. Krishna ho lol no ti arama. Sinkor's hilios wahe liop Krishna's lol.
"Lol your mother!" Krishna kiloa lol roflmao king.
Well, I can't read it, but knowing Christopher Paolini it's all in the back of the book. The last scene that I have for you is in English, and is slightly related to Christopher's series Eragon.
"Lords!" said Krishna. "I merely cannot believe that there are dragons in our world!"
"Aye, and Elves!" Kroanshka couldn't take his eyes of Krishna's face, he just kept staring and loling. Behind theme, Sinkor was dragging his feet, but Arya poked him with her hidwort and he started rooshking.
"Aye," she said. "Aye." They stopped walking for a moment, just looking at each other, drawing ever closer...
"Move it," said Eragon, his voice crisp. "We must reach the mountaintops." he pointed up to the mountaintops.
"Indeed..." Krishna frowned. "Why are we going there now again?"
"Answers always lie in mountaintops." Eragon sounded slightly annoyed, but kept walking,
"Eragon, I'm not sure..."
"Answers always lie in mountaintops." Eragon's voice turned firm.
"Aye, it's true," said Arya.
"All right," grumbled Krishna.
I don't know about you guys, but I think it looks amazing and I can't wait for the full book to come out. The series will be called The Heirloom Chronicles. Cheers! ~Pact Tieren Dighd
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Youtar
Hey, guys. This Thursday, I will share with you an excerpt from Christopher Paolini's next book series, The Heirloom Chronicles, Book one: Youtar. I can hardly wait!
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
ASMW
Hey, guys. I have a story to tell, and it's all completely true, no exaggeration. While you're reading, listen to this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mu71EAdnjQ0&feature=fvw So here goes.
Northampton highschool, having a great academic team, recently went to As Schools Match Wits, the show where schools match wits. My older brother happens to be on the team and is incredibly good at answering the questions given.
So my family and I all went to the studio, or at least that was the initial plan. But as my family pulled up to my school, I reached for a traffic light button to cross across to them. As I pulled away from the button, I realized that what I had thought to be a static shock to the finger had a bug sticking out of it.
A bee.
I wanted to scream, but I couldn't. I could feel the poison entering my body as I squeezed my pinky. Without thinking, I crossed the street, not checking to see if the light was green, or even if I was going the right way. In the end, my older brother came across and picked me up, but by that time my hand was numb.
We were running a little late. My older brother tried to call his friend on the team, but she wasn't answering.
Eventually, when my mother saw that I was clutching my hurt hand in the other, she decided to call my uncle, who was also coming, and tell him to bring some baking soda.
At this point, my older brother had to get dressed, and he realized that he didn't know how to put a tie on. As my mother frantically read the instructions off of MapQuest and wished that we had a GPS, my little brother tried to work out how to make the knot. I reflected on all of those times I had ignored it when Google offered me the instructions and cursed my past self.
A few years back, my father taught me to tie a tie, but I only remembered one step. I took the tie from my little brother, closed my eyes, (No exaggerations--maybe I just knew that I'd be writing about it later.) and carefully twisted. I was almost there--I opened my eyes again--and looked at the knot. It was lopsided, with one loose "string" hanging off to the side. I pondered for a moment and then stuck the loose bit through the tie part. (If you've ever tied a tie, you know what I mean.)
I handed the tie back to my brother and winced as I squeezed my pinky shut.
Suddenly my older brother's phone rang! We all listened for a second, and then he grabbed it and started talking.
"Is that you?" he paused. "Yes! We'll be running a little late. What are you all doing now?"
I heard his friend respond with "Waiting for you guys."
"Ah. Yes, of course." He sighed. "Okay, well we're almost there. Can you guys just tell the people with the TV show that we're almost there?"
"Ten minutes away," my mother said.
"We're ten minutes away!" He paused. "Mhmm... okay... alright, see you then!"
We kept on driving, and that is where the drama ends. We met with the producer, a friendly man named... Rob, I think...
I can't reveal who won, (Even though this blog is completely unread) but I can say that Northampton did their best, and that they either won or lost with honor. The episode airs APRIL 28TH, 2010 AT 7:30
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
The New One
How to envision an invention in 500 words!
Do your friends constantly tease you for your lack of originality? If you answered yes, then you are most likely a plagiarizing slob. Congratulations! You have completed step one of successfully envisioning an invention!
The process of envisioning an invention starts simply with watching sci fi movies—unpopular ones. These are filled with cool looking inventions that need inventing. “But that’s plagiarism!” you may shout. Okay, so then send the following people to jail:
1. Steve Jobs
2. Bill Gates
3. Tim Berners Lee
4. Michael Dell
5. Mike Lazaridis
6. ETC.
I honestly don’t think any of these people did much except watch sci fi as children, perhaps pausing for the occasional game of D & D or Final Fantasy. So if you’re not okay with plagiarism, then maybe building and marketing just aren’t for you.
Okay, so you have your own idea. Now think about it, improve it in your mind. For example, R2D2 is cool, but—what’s this?—R2D2 with an umbrella! R2D2 just got R2D-Pwnd!
Step three is making the invention more you-esque—take away an aspect of it, like R2D2’s being a robot. Now it’s just a cylinder with an umbrella! Still awesome, still original. Steve Jobs, inventor of the iPad, demonstrated this perfectly, taking away the ability to scan, lock on, connect wirelessly with spaceships, and look awesome when he ripped of the “PADD” from Star Trek. He’s simply a brilliant marketer.
Okay, most of the hard stuff is done. Now you just have to come up with a name. I named my R2D2 “The Umbrella Holder”. Look it up online, it’s there. Just like I promised, it holds umbrellas and it’s a cylinder.
If you want a practical name like Martin Cooper’s “Cell Phone” or my “Umbrella Holder” think about your invention. First you take the Subject and the Predicate (What the invention does to the subject) of the invention and tack “er” on to the end. So if your invention crushes puppies, you’ve made a Puppy Crusher. Feeds parrots? Parrot feeder. A handheld device that calls other people? People Caller, or, alternatively, Cell Phone.
But if you want something cooler, like “iPod touch,” (Would you buy a “Things displayer”? Neither would I.) Steve Jobs brilliantly made the iPod more personal with “i”. I mean i’m in there! I want to buy something with me in it! I made a product called “John Smith”, because so many people would say, “That product has my name in it! Let’s buy it!”
Don’t forget: a product is always cooler if you arbitrarily capitalize a few letters. Ipod becomes iPod, making the hate of grammar fun. Mcnuggets becomes McNuggets, making obesity fun. Essay becomes eSsay, making writing fun.
Try it! And do it to your name, like “McDonald”, or “jOe.
Step five: Dream your whole life long that the product could really exist, and tell your friends about it so that they can crush your dreams.
Happy imagining-only-to-find-out-you’re-just-a-dreamer!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Next week...
I'm going to teach you how to either climb a mountain or to envision an invention. Either way--I'm trembling!
I'm just joking, it's definitely going to be the invention.
Seriously--Check out Jonathancoulton.com!
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Here's the new one
Presidential seal draft
The presidential seal. That sounds important, right? Now that you’re old enough to know that it’s not just the president of ice bergs, you’re ready for the mature truth. It has to be some sort of secret thing that only twenty-one-year-olds are allowed to know, right?
Right!
We all know how important mail is to the government is, right? Naturally without it, our lives would be government-less and therefore pointless. (Or the senate would learn to talk to each other face to face .1)
And would it not be a bit awkward if the president had to hand in a veto in person? Irritating questions like “What do you mean you don’t think that you think citizens should be allowed to kill each other?” can be avoided by merely sending your veto in letter form.
But how can you make the president’s letter official? Umm, aside from the signature and witnesses of him or her writing it? That’s where the seal comes in. If it’s at the top off a letter, then you know that that letter was from the president to congress. This way, the president can feel just as important and official as every single six-year-old who makes a symbol for him or herself.
However, some speculate that there’s more to it than that. People might have proof that perhaps maybe Bill Clinton kind of burned or sold the old silverware from the White house and almost replaced it with synthetic sporks and fake forks. If this is kind of true, then maybe the reason nobody minded was because the new simulated spoons were special in some way. Well, what would make them more official, less informal, so that even ambassadors from foreign countries wouldn’t see what was wrong with these not real knives?
Hmmm, I wonder…
Hey, I know! How about… the subject of this essay?
So the president’s job is to make more money for war by selling old furniture and property of the white house, buy new stuff, and make it unique by putting the seal on it.
At least that’s what some believe. The saner of us know the truth about the most important symbol in the world, except for maybe this one: M
In emails, the president copies and pastes the seal into it. Unfortunately, It's too easy to get a hold of on the internet, and is often used for practical jokes. Anyone who comments on this page is subject to one of those.
The presidential seal. That sounds important, right? Now that you’re old enough to know that it’s not just the president of ice bergs, you’re ready for the mature truth. It has to be some sort of secret thing that only twenty-one-year-olds are allowed to know, right?
Right!
We all know how important mail is to the government is, right? Naturally without it, our lives would be government-less and therefore pointless. (Or the senate would learn to talk to each other face to face .1)
And would it not be a bit awkward if the president had to hand in a veto in person? Irritating questions like “What do you mean you don’t think that you think citizens should be allowed to kill each other?” can be avoided by merely sending your veto in letter form.
But how can you make the president’s letter official? Umm, aside from the signature and witnesses of him or her writing it? That’s where the seal comes in. If it’s at the top off a letter, then you know that that letter was from the president to congress. This way, the president can feel just as important and official as every single six-year-old who makes a symbol for him or herself.
However, some speculate that there’s more to it than that. People might have proof that perhaps maybe Bill Clinton kind of burned or sold the old silverware from the White house and almost replaced it with synthetic sporks and fake forks. If this is kind of true, then maybe the reason nobody minded was because the new simulated spoons were special in some way. Well, what would make them more official, less informal, so that even ambassadors from foreign countries wouldn’t see what was wrong with these not real knives?
Hmmm, I wonder…
Hey, I know! How about… the subject of this essay?
So the president’s job is to make more money for war by selling old furniture and property of the white house, buy new stuff, and make it unique by putting the seal on it.
At least that’s what some believe. The saner of us know the truth about the most important symbol in the world, except for maybe this one: M
In emails, the president copies and pastes the seal into it. Unfortunately, It's too easy to get a hold of on the internet, and is often used for practical jokes. Anyone who comments on this page is subject to one of those.
1HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Friday, March 12, 2010
First draft
I just completed my first draft on the essay about the presidential seal. Yay!
In other news...
I'm listening to music by perhaps THE GREATEST MUSICIAN EVER, Jonathan Coulton. He writes nerdy, funny, beautiful music and he doesn't pay people to advertise for him.
Much.
I'm just kidding. But really, check out his sight, you can listen to all of his songs for free!
http://www.jonathancoulton.com/store/downloads/
Seriously. Check it out.
My little Brother in kindergarten just got Pneumonia, so we're trying to comfort him. Apparently he was really excited about going to school today (He does math with the second graders and loves it. Six years old and solving for X already--I'm so proud and yet jealous at the same time.)
My older brother (A sophomore in highschool) is going to "As Schools Match Wits" soon, he's on the academic team for Northampton High School. He's also performing live with a quintet to play a piece of music that he wrote himself--I'm talking one of the best pieces of modern classical music that I've ever heard (I know that "Modern Classical Music" is an oxymoron. Just let it go.) All of this on top of his college class and an honors class. Wow.
Thanks for reading my rants, and may the constant milking of old, boring blog jokes (You!!! Are!!! HERE!!!) be with you.
In other news...
I'm listening to music by perhaps THE GREATEST MUSICIAN EVER, Jonathan Coulton. He writes nerdy, funny, beautiful music and he doesn't pay people to advertise for him.
Much.
I'm just kidding. But really, check out his sight, you can listen to all of his songs for free!
http://www.jonathancoulton.com/store/downloads/
Seriously. Check it out.
My little Brother in kindergarten just got Pneumonia, so we're trying to comfort him. Apparently he was really excited about going to school today (He does math with the second graders and loves it. Six years old and solving for X already--I'm so proud and yet jealous at the same time.)
My older brother (A sophomore in highschool) is going to "As Schools Match Wits" soon, he's on the academic team for Northampton High School. He's also performing live with a quintet to play a piece of music that he wrote himself--I'm talking one of the best pieces of modern classical music that I've ever heard (I know that "Modern Classical Music" is an oxymoron. Just let it go.) All of this on top of his college class and an honors class. Wow.
Thanks for reading my rants, and may the constant milking of old, boring blog jokes (You!!! Are!!! HERE!!!) be with you.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
I was looking for gadgets to add to the blog...
When I came across a fun looking RPG flash game. I put it up, and you can see it now, but I'm mainly posting this so that people can tell me to take it off if they want me to. I mainly put it up for my own pleasure, something I'm more than willing to sacrifice.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Okay, here it is!
Research
A good scholar or student will tell you that “research is but the only way to success,” but I’ve only ever viewed research as a bad thing. People like being right, and often one will write or say something instinctively, something that person will be proud of. Research only makes them feel bad about writing or saying it, because research will so often prove one wrong.
Not doing research is all of the rage these days. Over 10,000 American students are refusing to do research, and that leaves about 300 other students, or at least that’s what the internet doesn’t say. And even in office buildings, research is considered “Overrated” and “Boring”. One organization, Toyota’s owner stated in a personal interview “We think research holds us back from ‘Moving forward.’ We don’t hire somebody based on how well recommended they come, it’s usually about how high they can make the speedometer go. So really, it’s about how high they can count.”
Writers too like to hurry up and not do research. It can be easily seen in modern writing, you must merely open any book marked “fiction”. All of these have a gross pattern of having done a miniscule amount of research. Still, one cannot blame them; writing is hard enough without having to open another book every five minutes.
Perhaps no media knows what they are doing, but I find this unlikely. I don’t believe that the “news” could legally be called that if it didn’t have news in it. I myself have never seen a single television program with any opinion in it, proving the fact that the news does, in fact, use research.
So all this adds up to three questions: is research worth the time or the effort? Do you get a better product from doing research? What counts as “Research”?
Even a genius like myself cannot figure out the answer yet, but step one is to break up each question; for example, the first question and second questions can be figured out by writing this equation: “research = time research takes*effort = outcome” and then the question simply becomes “Is it worth it?” unfortunately, we humans have no good measurement of effort except for how much you make per hour divided by how long the research takes. So if it takes you 5 minutes, and you make 10 dollars per hour, it comes out to “research = 10=outcome.” The lower the number, the worse the outcome will be but the less bored you become.
The third question uses the same equation, but with something extra. You must divide by one of these numbers: by 1 if your source is a book or legal website (C.I.A. files, Wikipedia, ETC.) by 5 if the source is fiction or a blog (Unless you’re doing a book report, in which case divide by 1.), and by 10 if it’s a song. If you didn’t have a source, subtract 5. So the final equation is R = (T($PH÷T))÷S=O.
If the outcome is 5 or above, then your research was worth it! Here’s the equation for this paper:
R = (0(0÷0))-5 = -5. Wow. ~Pact Tieren Dighd
A good scholar or student will tell you that “research is but the only way to success,” but I’ve only ever viewed research as a bad thing. People like being right, and often one will write or say something instinctively, something that person will be proud of. Research only makes them feel bad about writing or saying it, because research will so often prove one wrong.
Not doing research is all of the rage these days. Over 10,000 American students are refusing to do research, and that leaves about 300 other students, or at least that’s what the internet doesn’t say. And even in office buildings, research is considered “Overrated” and “Boring”. One organization, Toyota’s owner stated in a personal interview “We think research holds us back from ‘Moving forward.’ We don’t hire somebody based on how well recommended they come, it’s usually about how high they can make the speedometer go. So really, it’s about how high they can count.”
Writers too like to hurry up and not do research. It can be easily seen in modern writing, you must merely open any book marked “fiction”. All of these have a gross pattern of having done a miniscule amount of research. Still, one cannot blame them; writing is hard enough without having to open another book every five minutes.
Perhaps no media knows what they are doing, but I find this unlikely. I don’t believe that the “news” could legally be called that if it didn’t have news in it. I myself have never seen a single television program with any opinion in it, proving the fact that the news does, in fact, use research.
So all this adds up to three questions: is research worth the time or the effort? Do you get a better product from doing research? What counts as “Research”?
Even a genius like myself cannot figure out the answer yet, but step one is to break up each question; for example, the first question and second questions can be figured out by writing this equation: “research = time research takes*effort = outcome” and then the question simply becomes “Is it worth it?” unfortunately, we humans have no good measurement of effort except for how much you make per hour divided by how long the research takes. So if it takes you 5 minutes, and you make 10 dollars per hour, it comes out to “research = 10=outcome.” The lower the number, the worse the outcome will be but the less bored you become.
The third question uses the same equation, but with something extra. You must divide by one of these numbers: by 1 if your source is a book or legal website (C.I.A. files, Wikipedia, ETC.) by 5 if the source is fiction or a blog (Unless you’re doing a book report, in which case divide by 1.), and by 10 if it’s a song. If you didn’t have a source, subtract 5. So the final equation is R = (T($PH÷T))÷S=O.
If the outcome is 5 or above, then your research was worth it! Here’s the equation for this paper:
R = (0(0÷0))-5 = -5. Wow. ~Pact Tieren Dighd
Next essay
I just finished revising the latest essay (It's about research) and I can't wait to release it tomorrow!
I've been sick for a while, so I got some songwriting done over the past week. The latest song is about homeschooling, something I understand pretty well. I could post a video of me playing what I've got so far, but it's going to need quite a bit of revision.
I've been sick for a while, so I got some songwriting done over the past week. The latest song is about homeschooling, something I understand pretty well. I could post a video of me playing what I've got so far, but it's going to need quite a bit of revision.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Essays
Hi, guys, you may have seen that my last post was a satirical essay on the apocalypse. Well, I have made a decision about this blog.
Often, people start a blog with a clear vision of what's going to happen.
I didn't have any idea about this blog. Honestly, I just missed having a blog. I homeschool, and I need a project.
Well, I've finally got it figured out.
Every Thursday, I'm going to release a new essay about something I read in the news.
I.
Am.
There.
Often, people start a blog with a clear vision of what's going to happen.
I didn't have any idea about this blog. Honestly, I just missed having a blog. I homeschool, and I need a project.
Well, I've finally got it figured out.
Every Thursday, I'm going to release a new essay about something I read in the news.
I.
Am.
There.
Apocalypse
Apocalypse
An essay
If you watch a dog, a cat, staring into the mirror, you will observe that its face is curled into an expression that can only be described as high self-esteem. This may not sound initially like a bad thing, but has turned our world into what it is today.
Humans used to be like those senseless animals, until they discovered something better: self-pity. A whole world was ahead of us once we saw our chance to fear the future, and what better way to fear the future than to see in it… death?
The Ancient Mayans, who were years ahead of their time, predicted long ago that the world would end in 2012, the start of pity-ology. The Mayans were also contributors to the invention of making excuses for killing people, a favorite of us Pity-ologists.
At some point in the 1900’s, a brilliant mind figured out that the world would end in 2000. This made sense because the number 0 signifies an ending, like in the sequence “5…4…3…2…1… 0!” or “3…2…1… 0!”. So the more zeroes in a number, the better the chances of the Apocalypse, the ultimate end.
The year 2000 came, but when it passed the humans weren’t too disappointed. Cries of “There’s still 2010!” and “There’s still 2012!” and “And if neither of those work out… let’s say… 2050!” could be heard all throughout the land, but the only apocalypse-related event in 2010 was the release of the movie “Quantum Apocalypse”. We tried not to get too downhearted, but it was hard, and after somebody’s theory that 20,000 (it is, after all, a large number with many zeroes in it) would be the year, we started to disperse.
But no longer must we be separated!
I am releasing this as a message to pity-ologists everywhere, for if time won’t take its iron grip on the world, then we must. There are many clear advantages to bringing destruction to the world, listed as follows:
First: honesty. You can never be wrong, ever. We all accepted this oath, so killing everyone would make us honest and good human beings.
Second: religion. God predicted the end, and he would seem quite the fool if he did not get the end. He would thank us all for getting him out of a tight spot.
Third: entertainment. To destroy a building is but one of life’s greatest pleasures, to work a flamethrower in a market is like finding a simile in a field of pedantic writing.
So my friends, let us perform this task of bravery, valor, and obliteration! And may we look back on the past, we may realize—we started as pity-ologists so as to predict and fear the future, but here we are now, anticipating that which we had designed to cause fear, and we, the puppets, have become the puppeteers. ~Pact Tieren Dighd, Pity-ologist
An essay
If you watch a dog, a cat, staring into the mirror, you will observe that its face is curled into an expression that can only be described as high self-esteem. This may not sound initially like a bad thing, but has turned our world into what it is today.
Humans used to be like those senseless animals, until they discovered something better: self-pity. A whole world was ahead of us once we saw our chance to fear the future, and what better way to fear the future than to see in it… death?
The Ancient Mayans, who were years ahead of their time, predicted long ago that the world would end in 2012, the start of pity-ology. The Mayans were also contributors to the invention of making excuses for killing people, a favorite of us Pity-ologists.
At some point in the 1900’s, a brilliant mind figured out that the world would end in 2000. This made sense because the number 0 signifies an ending, like in the sequence “5…4…3…2…1… 0!” or “3…2…1… 0!”. So the more zeroes in a number, the better the chances of the Apocalypse, the ultimate end.
The year 2000 came, but when it passed the humans weren’t too disappointed. Cries of “There’s still 2010!” and “There’s still 2012!” and “And if neither of those work out… let’s say… 2050!” could be heard all throughout the land, but the only apocalypse-related event in 2010 was the release of the movie “Quantum Apocalypse”. We tried not to get too downhearted, but it was hard, and after somebody’s theory that 20,000 (it is, after all, a large number with many zeroes in it) would be the year, we started to disperse.
But no longer must we be separated!
I am releasing this as a message to pity-ologists everywhere, for if time won’t take its iron grip on the world, then we must. There are many clear advantages to bringing destruction to the world, listed as follows:
First: honesty. You can never be wrong, ever. We all accepted this oath, so killing everyone would make us honest and good human beings.
Second: religion. God predicted the end, and he would seem quite the fool if he did not get the end. He would thank us all for getting him out of a tight spot.
Third: entertainment. To destroy a building is but one of life’s greatest pleasures, to work a flamethrower in a market is like finding a simile in a field of pedantic writing.
So my friends, let us perform this task of bravery, valor, and obliteration! And may we look back on the past, we may realize—we started as pity-ologists so as to predict and fear the future, but here we are now, anticipating that which we had designed to cause fear, and we, the puppets, have become the puppeteers. ~Pact Tieren Dighd, Pity-ologist
Sunday, January 31, 2010
My dark, mysterious past
I don't actually have a "dark, mysterious past", but you may have noticed by now the fact that the other two blogs I have are about "purple people", as is my name.
So let me explain: last year I went to a school, and it was fine, but I had my differences with the teacher and his system of "consequences" (despite the fact that these "consequences" were clearly punishments.) I started that first blog (purple people against pigmented paper) to communicate secretly about my thoughts and feelings about our class, the Purples, and the "yellow sheets" we got for not turning in our homework.
And then, halfway through the year, I dropped out, fed up with the whole thing. But my legacy lived on: numerous children in the class had started their own, brilliant blogs pertaining to the matter. (and just for the record, my friend O.F. just started a new blog about art, http://artandwritings.blogspot.com/ ) Then, one of my best friends, G.F. started a blog, "Purplepost" and invited me to be an admin. That is my story.
Well, that was my story. But now...
I!
AM!
HERE!!!
So let me explain: last year I went to a school, and it was fine, but I had my differences with the teacher and his system of "consequences" (despite the fact that these "consequences" were clearly punishments.) I started that first blog (purple people against pigmented paper) to communicate secretly about my thoughts and feelings about our class, the Purples, and the "yellow sheets" we got for not turning in our homework.
And then, halfway through the year, I dropped out, fed up with the whole thing. But my legacy lived on: numerous children in the class had started their own, brilliant blogs pertaining to the matter. (and just for the record, my friend O.F. just started a new blog about art, http://artandwritings.blogspot.com/ ) Then, one of my best friends, G.F. started a blog, "Purplepost" and invited me to be an admin. That is my story.
Well, that was my story. But now...
I!
AM!
HERE!!!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Here's a puzzler
A question to think about that I came up with during a dinner of Chinese food (Mmmmmm):
Okay, so a teacher ONLY teaches by example, but the only thing he want to teach his student is how to teach by example. How is this done?
I do not know the answer. CAN ONLY BE SOLVED WITH CRAB RANGOON IN ONE HAND AND CREAKY CHICKEN IN THE OTHER.
Think on it. Remember:
YOU!
ARE!
HERE!!!
Okay, so a teacher ONLY teaches by example, but the only thing he want to teach his student is how to teach by example. How is this done?
I do not know the answer. CAN ONLY BE SOLVED WITH CRAB RANGOON IN ONE HAND AND CREAKY CHICKEN IN THE OTHER.
Think on it. Remember:
YOU!
ARE!
HERE!!!
You are here
Existence--->3rd dimension
3rd dimension--->The Universe
The Universe--->Milky Way
Milky Way--->Earth
Earth--->("" & ContinentName & "")
("" & ContinentName & "")--->("" & CountryName & "")
("" & CountryName & "")---[skipping state, city, ETC. names]---->The building you're in
The building you're in--->On the computer
On the computer--->On my blog
On my blog--->Bored enough to read this post.
YOU!
ARE!
HERE!!!
3rd dimension--->The Universe
The Universe--->Milky Way
Milky Way--->Earth
Earth--->("" & ContinentName & "")
("" & ContinentName & "")--->("" & CountryName & "")
("" & CountryName & "")---[skipping state, city, ETC. names]---->The building you're in
The building you're in--->On the computer
On the computer--->On my blog
On my blog--->Bored enough to read this post.
YOU!
ARE!
HERE!!!
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